Crazy love chapter 1

Holy cow. So its been a while since I put this book down "crazy love" and I just decided to start over from the beginning and devote myself to reading what this book has to say and do my best to fully understand how much God loves me. Which after reading this some more I am coming to the conclusion that I will never understand it fully but I'm learning a little more about how much He does love me. So in chapter one the author Francis Chan talks about just taking a look and marevelling at Gods magnificant creation. He talked a lot about the stars and the galaxies. If you want to watch a video he has posted go to the website (www.crazylovebook.com) and watch the awe factor video. After I watched this video I was basically in awe of just how much God has created and just how amazing it really is. I kept reading as the author explained things that God has created like the caterpillar and a spider and the human heart, and I was actually dumbfounded. When I talk about God I try to avoid saying cliche things and try to make it more from the heart. But when I look back at what I am trying to explain is that God is simple at the same time completely complicating. He is simple in that all He wants is for us to want a relationship with Him and follow his commands; but He is complicated in the way that I still cannot wrap my head around the idea of the trinity. (but that's another blog in itself that I don't even want to try to unfold.) The next video is one that I HIGHLY recommend you going to watch. It's on the same website as the last and it call just stop and think. ( I also put it on my twitter page and Facebook) And when I watched this video my heart was opened and my world was wrecked in awe of just how much God loves me. Francis Chan explains it in a way that is so simple that it's insane to even think about. God sent his son Jesus to die for me on a cross for my sins. And yes I'm sure whether you're a Christian or not you've heard that verse at some point on your life, whether it was on a billboard or one a cookout cup or on the bottom of a forever21 shopping bag. But if you sit back and think about it that God sent the one person who He loves the most to die a cruel death on a cross for something he didn't do. He died for things that I did. Terrible things that I do daily. But God took that all away because he loves me that much. Francis Chan said to think about the one person you love the most and think about them dying on a cross and realize that pain... God felt that pain, but he did it so that he could have a personal relationship with you and me. And that alone is enough to bring anyone to tears. Ya know, I have never in 21 almost 22 years now, doubted that God loved me. But until tonight I don't know if I realized just how much. And it's only the first chapter of this book. I think the coolest part of God loving me is that He doesn't demand a relationship from me... But he begs for me to want him the way he wants me. The bible says we are his bride, but God doesn't make us do anything. He wants us to want him and I think that's so cool of him; because honestly God could make us be in a relationship with him because of what he did for us. But he doesn't. He wants a real and tangible relationship with us that is a two way street. If he made us be in this relationship it would be one way. But God doesn't want that. And neither do I. I love being able to have a two way relationship with a God who loves me this much. This whole thing may sound crazy and silly because it's literally coming out of my head with no thought at all. But I really was wrecked by this first chapter. And in awe of a God who created everything on earth but still wants a relationship with a silly and sinful person like me. Go get this book. You will not be disappointed. And if you do let me know!!! I want to hear what you think! Kelsey Zephaniah 3:17

2 Years and Counting

When we first met I would have told you that we would not have hung out. Maybe we would have been friends, flirted on occasion, a text message that said hey hope your day is going well, or a great game last night (with a cool high five). Little did I know all those things would happen, plus so much more. A little over two years ago, I was at Methodist University starting out a new year as a sophomore and starting a new exciting volleyball season. I would see you in the gym and I would see you around campus and there were all those things listed above, a hello, a little flirting, and a cool high five after a "great game last night"! It wasn't until later that I got the text messages, and I think the first thing I said was "how did you get this number?" And who ever gave you my number, I am so glad that they did! We hung out a couple times and we got to know each other pretty well. I think we played 20 Questions EVERY NIGHT! All my friends kept asking me where this was going. I really had no idea because we hadn't really talked about that yet, all I knew was that I absolutely loved being around you! I mean seriously, you bought be ice cream from Cold Stone the first time we ever hung out! (You definitely knew the way to make me smile!) My friends would ask me is he going to ask you to be his girlfriend? And I was like I DONT KNOW!! They even got my hopes up big time one night. We were going to dinner and they told me for sure that you would ask me out that night. So all night long I was so nervous about when you were going to do it, but the night kept getting closer to ending and still no talk about it. As the night ended I was for sure bummed, but it wasn't too bad, I had had one awesome night! But I felt like it was more that just that. And it was. Finally one night we were just hanging out and you were actually going to come home with me for the weekend. Before we parted ways, you asked me in the most simple yet sweetest ways if I wanted to be your girlfriend, I jumped up and was so excited that we both looked at the clock to see what time it was so that we could always remember. I know, I know, it totally sounds cheesy, but it wasn't. It was so special. It is a night I will never forget. Needless to say, even at the beginning I had my doubts, I wasn't going to get my hopes up for anything. Everything is so fun and exciting at the beginning and I didn't want that to run out. I expected us both to get really busy and just kind of "go our separate ways" if you will. But no, everything was working and clicking really well. I guess what I am trying to get at here is that for such a long time I prayed so hard that God would send me in the right direction with the life that He wanted me to be living. Things were going well for me and the last thing I had on my mind was a boy, but then you fell right into place. I had prayed and prayed for the longest time that God would put someone in my life that loved Him more than anything, and wasn't afraid to show it off. To send me someone who's family is loving and caring. Someone that things are easy and simple with. Someone that pushes me to be a better me. Someone who wants the best for me no matter what that means. And I know its so cliche but God gave me someone that does all those things and so much more. Two years ago you asked me to be your girlfriend and I had no idea what God had in store for us. But the last two years have been more than I ever expected. I thank God for who you are and who you are turning into. You are such an inspiration in my life, and I don't know what I would do if I had let my fear of expecting too much get in the way. And one thing i did learn was that I need to expect the most out of any one God has placed in my life. You are such an amazing blessing in my life and I'm so glad God put you in my life. And I cannot wait to see what else He has in store for us! I love you Tyler! Thank you for everything you have done to make me a better me.